Wednesday, December 07, 2005

The Door Test

Everyone has their own little things that they do to try to determine whether or not the person they are going out with is a "keeper" or just someone to mess around with. Well after watching A Bronx Tale with a bunch of my boys back in the day. It's there that Sonny bestows his wisdom on C about the fairer sex. Sonny tells C that you only get 3 Great Women in your life and you can determine whether the person you are going out on a date is a great one by the Door Test.

Basically what the door test is, when you go to pick up your date, you lock the door to the driver's side door. You go to the girl's door, open the door for her and close it behind her. Then, you look in through the back window of the car. If the girl reaches over and unlocks the door then she's a great one. If she doesn't then it means the broad is selfish and you are supposed to dump the chick right then and there.

I've done this test numerous times and funny enough it's worked to let me know which girls are considered keepers and which ones were girls that ended up as the butt of my jokes on a blog. However, I never took Sonny's advice to dump the girl right then and there because hey, if I could get mine then why bother dumping her just yet, right? Well this test creates some problems though that my boys and I were talking about a few weekends ago. Right now, most cars come with Keyless entry, so what are you supposed to do when you hit the button to unlock the door and let the girl in, lock it again and see if she unlocks it? That just makes you look like a stalker or a freak. Like what the hell is this guys doing. Plus if the test is supposed to be inconspicuous, wouldn't she find out something was up if you locked the car AFTER you let her in?

Another problem we saw is that some cars (my last car used to be like this) basically make the lock go completely into the door and the girl doesn't know that you can just use the door handle to open it then she can't possibly pass the test. So do we give her partial credit for trying, does that make her a good one rather than a great one, does that mean that at the end of the night you might cop a feel rather than going all the way?

Lastly we tried to figure out exactly how many times does the girl have to pass the door test before it's considered a sure thing? I mean when you first start in a relationship you hide all your flaws and basically put on a front. What if she is a selfish broad, but has seen the movie and knows about the test? Is there a determinate amount of time required before she can be put on the Great One list?

I guess there is never going to be a test that accurately tells us one way or another if the woman we are dating is a sure thing, or just a story for a blog. If you freakin women would just be easy to read like us guys we wouldn't have to come up with these ridiculous tests to try to figure you out. Oh well, I'm back for better or worse, I hope I haven't lost too many of ya'll yet.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good to have you back!! Missed you.

1:27 AM  
Blogger Puerto Rican Angel said...

LOL I've seen A Bronx Tale and the whole trick to the door thing is to get out of the car and lock all the doors. Then when you walk her to the passenger door you unlock her side with the key. Your side is still locked. Once she gets in she's supposed to lean over and unlock your side while you walk around the back of the car. By the way FYI I still unlock the driver door to this day so Hah it's not a front.

6:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

uggg guys are lame sometimes

1:17 AM  
Anonymous car door unlocking said...

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9:15 AM  
Blogger AimsterSkitz0rz said...

The blog title is freak'n funny. I did indeed stumble upon this blog post by accident while trying to find the scene from the bronx tale your referring to. Prompted by a funny meme I saw this morning regarding chivalry. link: We don't have automatic door locks in our car and usually If I am in the passenger seat before he gets in I unlock and slightly open the door for him, cuz I ain't an ungrateful bitch.

12:29 PM  

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