Friday, September 30, 2005

IT'S A GIRL!!!

Two weeks early, but Baby Rican is now Baby Ricanette! Baby and wifey are both doing well. I'll post more later!

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Welcome to the Neighborhood

4 pack of light bulbs - $1.79

A pair of window curtains - $29.99

Blinds for the window - $50.00

Turning on the light to your spare bedroom to get dressed while your new neighbor across the street is getting his newspaper, while staring into your curtainless blindless window (since I was too lazy to put them up this weekend) and realizing you are giving him a full frontal shot? Priceless

Sidebar: Ya'll know I'm a reality TV fool. I was watching the Biggest Loser last night. You know the competition where morbidly obese people kill themselves to lose an insane amount of weight unhealthily quickly. Well one of the especially large men had a shortness of breath problem hence an ambulance was called. 2 ambulances show up, it seems one of the girls had the same problem unbeknownst to the guy's teammates (it's guys vs. girls) causing another large dude to say, well I know so and so is big, but he ain't that big. To quote my friend Nugget "Gold."

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Community Relations?

Many of you know that I work in a really small town (like 2,000 people). Part of being a firm in a small town is doing stuff in the community to drum up walk-in business. There is a little Farmer's Market in this town every Saturday. One of my bosses told, eh I mean asked me to volunteer this past Saturday passing out free BBQ to the locals. I had a million things I would have rather done, but I knew he wanted me to do this so I agreed. Besides it was only for about 3 hours so I could still do the things that still needed to be done.

I called the guy coordinating the BBQ and told him I was coming. In a deep Texas drawl, he said, "Glad to have ya on board." Already, I knew this was going to be an adventure. When people talk to me on the phone, I don't sound Rican since I don't have an accent and I annunciate. However, when they see me, there is no denying I'm brown. His first comment to me when he actually met me was, "man you don't look like you're from Puerta Ricah." I assured him that I was, put on an apron and began serving BBQ.

The food went over great and the small town folks loved it. I passed around numerous business cards that were probably used for napkins. In fact, I saw 2 that had BBQ stains on them in the garbage can while we were cleaning up. Anyways, after the food was finished, I helped clean up. I was taking down the tent that was set up. I untied 3 knots but struggled with the 4th. Texas boy saw me strugglin' and, in an apparent brain malfunction says, "Why don't you just cut the string? Don't all Puerta Ricahns carry knives or some kind of switchblade?" Welcome to small town Wisconsin folks!

Monday, September 26, 2005

Wow What a Weekend of Football!

How else does one define happiness? By having all your teams have a great football weekend. I'm a sports nut. I follow my teams pretty closely and, admittedly pathetic, my attitude tends to change whether they win or lose. However, this weekend was one for the ages! Well, at least it was one where all the stars seemed to align for all the teams the Rican follows. Here is a short recap.

Saturday: Wisconsin had a big game against Big Ten rival Michigan. Wisconsin, historically, struggles badly against this Big Ten power. The Badgers had not beaten Michigan since 1994. That all changed this past Saturday. In his farewell season, Barry Alvarez finally beat Michigan Coach Lloyd Carr (he had been 0-6 previously against him). In what has become known as "Barry Ball," the Badgers grinded it out on the ground with stud tailback Brian Calhoun and won it with a quarterback sneak in the final minutes. Final Score 23-20 and the Badgers are 4-0 in a season many said was a rebuilding year. While that might still be true, this Rican has a feeling that this could be a special team.

Saturday night: UCF finally wins a game! This might mean much to the casual fans since teams win games pretty regularly. But not the Knights. They had been 0-17 in their last 17 games. They had gone 699 days without a victory. Almost 2 damn years! The Knights were a constant presence in ESPN's Bottom 10 including as recently as 3 weeks ago being ranked #1. All that changed at the hands of former MAC rival Marshall University. UCF followed Marshall into Conference USA this year after struggling against them in the MAC. It was supposed to be a rivalry in the making that never materialized due to UCF's inaptitude. Now, after being 0 for their last 699 days, the Knights are in first place in the Eastern Division of Conference USA. Even though they are 1-2 overall, the important record is 1-0 (conference record). Way to go Knights!!

Sunday: Living in Wisconsin and not being a die hard Packers fan is sacrilegious. It's not that I'm not a fan, I follow them and cheer them causally. However, when they play the Bucs, all bets are off. I had gotten crap throughout the week from some of my buddies from up here. They knew that Tampa Bay had not won in Wisconsin since 1989. But this is a different team. This team has early season MVP and Offensive Rookie of the Year candidate Carnell "Cadillac" Williams in the backfield. Cadillac tore through Green Bay's tough run defense for 158 yards on the ground and the Bucs held off the Pack 17-16 at Lambeau Field. With the victory, the Bucs are now 3-0 and in first place of the NFC South Division. The defense is reminiscent of it's 2003 Super Bowl team giving up less than 12 points a game. Cadillac becomes the first player EVER to start his NFL career with 3 straight 100 yard games. Legendary players Emmitt Smith (all time leading rusher), Barry Sanders (the sickest back I've ever seen) and Jim Brown did not do that. I'm not suggesting Cadillac is up there yet, but he sure looks special.

Man what a weekend!

Thursday, September 22, 2005

How Does One Define Happiness?

This seems to be a question no one can answer. What works for one person might not work for someone else. However, here is one humble Rican's feeble attempt at answering said query. Happiness is...

* Finishing your drive through fast food then looking inside the bag to find a few more french fries.

* Waking up in the middle of the night, looking at the clock, then realizing you still have hours before you need to wake up.

* Finding a cure for blue balls in the morning.

* Having an orgasm that was not self induced.

* Waking up on a Thursday morning knowing that Survivor and The Apprentice are on tonight AND knowing that I only have 1 more day until the weekend.

* Flipping on HBO and finding Taxi Cab Confessions (or anything close to an NC-17 rating) on.

* Knowing my fantasy football team is in first place in two leagues.

* The 1st and 15th of every month.

* Finding out one of your especially bitchy exs now weighs close to a deuce.

* The Chapelle Show seasons 1 & 2.

* Going to the movies, knowing that you just snuck in a drink, candy, and popcorn

And last but not least...

* Knowing Baby Rican is less than 3 weeks away!

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

There's Funny Luck and Then There's Mojo's Luck

Everyone has a friend that always seems to be the one that crazy/funny stuff happens to. For the longest time I used to think it was me since some of the stuff that happened to me didn't happen to anyone else. That is, until I met my boy Mojo. I've known this dude since my sophomore year in college. He is absolutely hysterical but for some reason, homeboy can never seem to get a break. Here are a few examples of Mojo's luck.

The first time I ever met this dude, was at a party to celebrate my and this girl's birthday party. It was pretty close to the end of the spring semester so we weren't sure how many people would show up because of finals. As it turns out we had exceeded the number of guests allowed per apartment in this gated complex so I had the idea to go outside the gate to tell people where they could park and sneak over. My boy Big John and I were out there first when he said he would be right back since he had to go to the bathroom. He sent his brother Mojo to come out and help me "direct traffic." Mojo came over and we started to just talk about random stuff since it was the first time we met. I was already pretty buzzed so the conversation, I'm sure anyway, was pretty once sided since Mojo only had one beer.

Well, it seems that the rent-a-cop that was manning the gate caught onto our plan (after all we were doing it right in front of his little booth) and started yelling at us to go over there. Since I lived about a half mile away I told Mojo we should just walk back to my place. He agreed but before we could even make it to the main road an undercover cop in a Mustang pulled us over. He told us to get back to the booth because we were being "detained." Being the smart ass that I am, I asked him for a ride but he politely told me to walk back since I had walked away in the first place. We got back to the booth and were questioned. He asked me if I was drunk so I told him, "Hell yeah!" He turned to Mojo and Mojo answered, "No sir, I've only had one." The cop took one look at him and said, "Now I know you are lying, at least this guy had the balls to tell the truth." Mojo and I got our mug shots taken and were told that if we ever return to this complex we would be arrested (I made that bitch take my picture twice to make sure he got my good side). Mojo and I walked back to my place and immediately got on the horn trying to figure out a way to get back into the party. We figured out a way to sneak in using one of my boy's SUV. I laid down in the back seat covered by a blanket and Mojo laid down in the very back (like hatchback part) with another blanket. On our way over, something fell on Mojo but he had to sit there and not say a word. Finally, we got back in the party w/o further incidents.

A couple of years later, we all went on Spring Break together. I rode in Mojo's car with my boys De-licious, and LB. Mojo took the first driving shift and the rest of us slept. On our first pit stop, we grabbed some 20oz bottles of soda, drank 1/3 then filled the rest up with alcohol. LB took the second driving shift and I moved into the front seat with the directions (and drink of course). I looked back at Mojo expecting him to either be drunk or sleeping, but he was running his hand up and down the window stroking it. I had no idea what he was doing and then he caught us looking and said, "What? I'm fucking claustrophobic!" Well dude it would be nice if you had told us that before you decided to drive your small ass Honda Civic on a 6-7 hour road trip.

We finally got to Panama City around 10:00 A.M. (we had left mad early obviously). Check-in wasn't for another 5 hours so we parked, grabbed our coolers and made our way to the beach. It seemed everybody was out there. We found a spot, set our stuff down and started drinking. After a few minutes, Mojo, LB, Woody and Bhudda (I think) decided they were going to go into the water. Being Florida boys, we knew that the water was going to be ice cold (to us anyway) so they figured if they run in, it would cut down on the shock. In a scene out of a gay porno, the four of them took off running toward the ocean (I swear I saw this in slow motion). They all hit the water running and dove in when they reached waist level water. Well, all except for Mojo. Mojo had hit a sandbar while running and turned his ankle really bad, almost to the point of it being broken. He limped out of the water and his ankle was huge. The rest of us couldn't stop laughing. He drank away his pain and just laid around until it was time to check in.

We were herded into a big ballroom where everyone who was checking in was supposed to form a line. Since Mojo couldn't stand he decided to sit outside in the hall and wait for our turn. We made it through the line, checked in, and went looking for Mojo but he was nowhere to be found. We searched the beach, and the hotel but had no luck finding him. About 4 hours later, he appeared by our room with a blanket that didn't belong to any of us. We asked him where the hell he was and he told us that he was tired and cold so he came into the ballroom, grabbed a blanket that he saw nearby and fell asleep. At this point his ankle was huge but he said it no longer hurt. We all decided to get ready and hit the bars.

We partied it up pretty hard that night. I was cornered by some chick who told me that she was looking for a random hookup since her boyfriend was in jail. The place was packed and we pretty much all lost each other. I found Mojo and a few others and we decided to walk back to our hotel. While walking back, Mojo told me he had to piss and I told him I had to also. We decided to pull up to the next building we saw and just piss on the wall. One of my friends pulled me away and said, "dude you don't want to do that." Before I could warn Mojo, he had let it fly. It turns out the building he chose was the security building, and he pissed on the wall next to the door as the guard walked out. He was arrested. He was told that if he didn't want to go to jail, he would have to clean the hotel the next morning with the rest of the people that were arrested. Naturally he chose to clean the hotel. We woke up the next morning to a knock on our door from a limping Mojo with a mop, bucket and a vacuum cleaner. While the rest of us partied like it was 1999, poor Mojo cleaned the hotel the entire day with the rest of the arrested rejects. If it wasn't for shitty luck, I don't know what Mojo would have.

Monday, September 19, 2005

F&*#ed up Dreams

Has anyone ever had those dreams that when you wake up the next day you thought to yourself where the hell did THAT come from? Last week I had dreams on back to back nights that had me shaking my head in the morning.

My first dream was a crazy sex dream with a girl I went to law school with. She had asked (this isn't part of the dream this is background info) me if I had an outline for one of her classes. I told her I did and that I would email it to her when I found it. Well I went looking for it and couldn't find it so I decided I'd give her my hard copy. I went to bed that night and I guess that was still in my head. I dreamt that we were in tax class together and started going at it in the middle of class but no one around seemed to notice or care. We finished and I uttered the cheesiest line I could think of, "I've been waiting to do that to you since your 1L year." Damn.

The next night I went to bed without anything like that on my mind. However, I had watched some shit on HBO about kidnapping. I'm not sure exactly how my dream went but I remember the general idea. For some reason I killed someone was holed up in some compound with hostages. I couldn't figure out why I had killed the person but I remember contemplating suicide since I didn't want to go to jail. Finally the police talked me out of suicide and told me I would be going to jail in Puerto Rico. Man, that's the last time I eat ice cream and watch HBO before bed...

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Asshole of the Week

This week it wasn't quite as easy for me to decide who I wanted to give the prestigious Asshole of the Week award to. It's certainly not for lack of nominees. I think Bush could be nominated every week and his shitty attempt at an apology for the response to Katrina almost made me puke in my own mouth. But he's too easy. This week I'm going to go with the NCAA.

Why you ask? What could the good people of college athletics have possibly done? Nothing, that's the fucking problem. Given the chance to help out a lot of the people of Katrina, the NCAA denied college basketball's request for an extra preseason game to raise money for the relief efforts. Given an opportunity, just this one time, to allow athletes to transfer schools without sitting out the mandatory year under the current rules, the NCAA said no. They reasoned that they didn't want colleges "looting" the affected schools leaving them with little if any talent. That's completely preposterous. I personally do not think most athletes would leave their college because of the current tragedy affecting the Gulf Coast, but I know some would like to go somewhere else where this kind of thing perhaps doesn't happen. Perhaps some of them want to go to a school where they are actually playing "home" games. Regardless the reason, the NCAA needs to back off from it's heartless stance that allows coaches to jump ship but not the athletes that makes it billions of dollars every year. Congratulations NCAA for being the Rican's Asshole of the Week!

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Things Guys Never Want to Hear From a Girl

Here is a list of things a guy never wants to hear from a girl in one context or another. Feel free to add more if you can think of anything that I left off.

1) "Is it in yet"...uh I'm already done

2) "Wow I totally wanted to sleep with you too" (after your missed opportunity)

3) "I'm a lesbian" (when you lean in for the kiss after the Rican look)

4) "I'm not laughing at it, really, it's just cute"

5) "Size doesn't matter...really"

6) After you tell her it's not your porn she just found, "that's a shame cause I really like that"

7) "It's not your kid"

8) "You remind me so much of my brother (or friend)" when you try to make a move

9) "You are just too nice for me to do anything with you"

10) "Can we talk"

11) "I like guys that are a little soft around the middle"

12) "Damn I think I just got my period" (when you are planning on making the move

13) "I'd love to be with a woman, but I could never do it with you there"

14) "Do you think she's pretty"

15) "Would you mind if I didn't shave this week?"

16) "That's not the way (insert EX's name here) used to do it"

17) "Do you see anything different about me?"

18) "Man you are just like one of the girls"

19) "Do these pants make me look fat?"

20) "I used to be a guy"

Update:

21) "You were the last guy I slept with before becoming a lesbian"

Free Lunch?

My tax professor for the past two years used to say there is no such thing as a free lunch (although I think he was talking about the IRS but who cares). You know what? Obviously, that fool never joined any of the numerous groups around law school. If you plan your shit right, you could count on eating free at least once a week on the law school's dime (at least you could at mine).

I didn't really learn this trick until about my second semester of my second year so I missed out on a lot. After I found out you could eat free all the time I became the most well rounded law student in law school. One week I was a Federalist student, the next I was in Democrats in Law School. I think in one week alone I was Black, Latino and Indian just to get free pizza, subs you name it. I think I was even on the email list for the lesbian and gay society, the environmental law society, and the Jewish law society. I never really cared too much for any of these organizations (except for the Latino one since I'm the one that had to get the pizza and look at those damn moochers eating our shit just because it was there), BUT when it came time for food, you know my ass was standing up for whatever that particular organization was about. Shit, I even think I told someone that I voted for Bush because he asked me in the line to get food.

The other one to keep an eye out is for career services. They seem to put up free lunch signs all the time. Homer, Nugget, and I went 3 days straight with free food. We basically went in took some food and left in the middle of the presentation because we had class. So my dear 1Ls who wonder what groups they should join my advice is simply, join them all (at least their e-mail lists). Chances are you will be able to laugh at your tax professor who missed out on the free lunch!

Monday, September 12, 2005

Mascots

Have you ever noticed that there are some funky mascots out there. I was at a party recently were I didn't really know anyone except for Homer. I was introduced to some pretty cool people (including a Luger top 10!) and we began discussing the different colored shot glasses on the table. The shots were purple and yellow so I assumed the person who made them was a Lakers fan. Nope it turns out she was a Pointers fan.

What's a pointer you ask? I had the same reaction. It turns out that UW-Steven's Point are called the Pointers (after dog not the city). I mean couldn't they be a little more creative than this? As one girl pointed out at the party, does that mean that their big foamy hands at the football games just have one finger pointing into different directions?

After this conversation I started thinking about different mascots that were either weird or just plain dumb. Here's what I could come up with:

1) Stuff the Magic Dragon - I'm a huge Magic fan so this hurts but seriously, just because the team is in Orlando doesn't mean you gotta name it after an amusement park?

2) Oregon State Beavers - when I think of Beavers I sure as hell don't get all scared or intimidated, in fact I think of....nevermind

3) Any team with the mascot Aggies - just what the hell is an Aggie? Any Texas A&M alums out there care to share?

4) Pittsburgh Penguins - I'm not a hockey fan so I might be off base here, but really what the hell can a Penguin do? Waddle over and slap you with those little flippers, seriously?

5) New York Mets - this is actually short for metropolitans. Metropolitans? A city of 9 million people and you couldn't think of anything more creative than this? No wonder they end up playing second fiddle to the Yankees.

Are there any other mascots out there that ya'll can think about? My mind is drawing a blank but I'm sure there are more.

Friday, September 09, 2005

Old School?

I used to make fun of my parents and some of their friends when they would listen to the "oldies" station because it truly pointed out their age. I also told myself that I would probably suffer from instant depression the first time I heard one of the songs I got down to on the Oldies station. Thankfully it hasn't happened yet (at least not that I know of, since my radio rejects those stations for its owner's sanity). However, lately I've been listening to the radio when the DJs say "here's an old school jam for all of ya'll," only to end up playing something, that to me at least, is not what I would consider old School.

For example, just this morning on my way to work, the DJ said that same line then started playing "Juicy" by Biggie. I've heard that line used before songs like "Ditty," "Dear Mama," anything by DMX, and LL Cool J. Since when is like 6-8 years ago old school? I thought old school meant like way back in the day at least 15 years ago. Damn when the hell did I become "Old School?" I mean I know I'm getting old and shit but shit I'm only 26!

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Asshole of the Week

This is seriously almost too easy. I was going to go with that bitch Katrina because of all the devastation she has brought with her but that was last week (man my award is just slipping by week by week). However, former first lady came the rescue this week. In case you don't know (which I'm sure you do since it's been all over the place) this woman said the following when referring to the thousands of refugees from New Orleans that are housed in the Astrodome, ""...many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this, this is working very well for them."

Are you serious? This is working out for them? Who the fuck wants to be in the damn Astrodome when your city is under 12 feet of water. Does she think this is the damn Four Seasons? There is a reason why the Astros (or any other professional team for that matter) plays in this thing. It's old, it's dirty and there aren't exactly queen size beds just hanging around. These people are trying to live in small upright chairs using bathrooms that are old as sin with essentially no shower. It also ain't like you got the cracker jack and peanut guy coming around selling shit right after the beer guy you know?

It's hard for me to have confidence in this family when they open their mouth and shit like that comes out. Congratulations B, you are the Rican's asshole of the week!

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

First Day of School

Oh wait, it's not my first day since I already graduated. It feels a tad strange (ok more than just a tad but I don't want to sound like that old guy that can't say goodbye) and depressing for me not to be in school right now. With the exception of a year between law school and undergrad I have been in school for 19 years (damn!). It's a good thing I still have friends in school to live vicariously through and get me through my slight depression.

Naturally there are some things I miss more than others. I don't miss being the first person called on in class on the first day. See law school has this shitty habit of assigning homework BEFORE school starts. I also don't miss the $500 a semester that you have to spend around the first day of school for books that you might not even read (but they sure are impressive in my office).

I do miss the anticipation of getting to class early to scope out the good seats. You know the kind I'm talking about. They are the seats next to the hot girl (or guy whatever floats your boat) in the class and if that's not available, then the seats at the back of the class that allow you to play online (and watch movies) w/o being distracting too many people (really w/o anyone knowing what you are watching). Cause you know you don't want to end up in the front few rows with the gunners and tightwads.

I miss walking into class my first year and seeing whether or not you got lucky in your small group. Whether or not you were rewarded with cool good looking people, which I did because we had an unusually high number of attractive women and cool people in my group. I also miss walking into class and sizing up your classmates. You know you do that. You look at everyone and try to determine whether they are smarter than you or not, whether they will be the gunner of the class, or whether they will bring up the curve.

Man I can't believe I ain't in class today. This is a sad day in Rican world. This is the day I realize that I am no longer a student. Now I have a real job with real shit to worry about. What I'm trying to say is everyone who is going back to school (or already has) enjoy it damn it. Before you know you will be the old guy at the bar talking about blogging and blogging about how much you miss school.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Things I'll Never Understand

Why is it that Bush was playing the guitar on Wednesday immediately after one of the worst disasters in the country's history and then Friday states that the relief results are unacceptable? If that were the case where the hell have you been? Why have you waited until today to fly down and examine the damage?

Why is it that every picture I see of the carnage in New Orleans always includes nothing but black people? Do you think the relief results Bush talks about being unacceptable would have been different if it was Texas or if it was mostly white people suffering? I'm not suggesting he's a racist but one has to wonder why these people have been treated like savages in a third world country and not Americans in the 21 century.

Why is it that the stories I hear about on the news are about Brett Favre's family, Marshall Faulk's family and every other athlete or celebrity who happens to have family in the area of the destruction? Why can't we show concern for those people and in addition to the poor families of these famous people? They are all in this together.

Why is it that it takes Congress 5 days since the hurricane hit to call of their recess to approve Billions of dollars in aid that was needed 4 days ago?

How Not to Impress Your Boss

Me: Damn, (other associate) do you know why the light is still on in the bathroom?

Other Associate: I think it's because it's attached to the fan.

Me: Attached to the fan? That light has been on for the past hour.

Other Associate: I think (my boss) was the last one to use it.

Me: Damn he must have dropped some serious ass in there to keep that fan on for that long. Bombs Away!

Boss: I can hear you and for your information I had just forgotten to shut it off can you get that for me now?

Me: Uh sure...

Thursday, September 01, 2005

The Coupon Dilemma

I've been around coupons most of my life. My mom has clipped them for as long as I remember and since I have moved out of my house, I've clipped them myself. Is this another one of those women things that I end up doing? I have no problems using coupons at the grocery store for cereal, bread, etc. I figured if those are necessities of life why not save $0.35. Why not get a pizza free of equal or greater value with the purchase of one at the regular menu price you know? However, there is a certain stigma when people use coupons. They are often seen as being cheap (or frugal if you prefer).

Well lately (by lately I think I mean within the last 5 years) there have been entertainment books put out for fundraising purposes. In these books there are a plethora of coupons from golf courses to grocery stores and restaurants. Well in here lies my dilemma. Again, I have no problem using a coupon at a place like Mickey D's, BK or Taco Bell but a sit down place? That's a little different. Some of these entertainment books have coupons for really nice upscale restaurants and some have it for your run of the mill Olive Garden and Chili's (more my style).

But again there is that stigma about coupon clippers. They are often seen as being cheap (or frugal if you prefer). I don't care who thinks I'm cheap at Target or the local grocery store but damn I don't want my server thinking I'm going to stiff him/her at Chili's because the bill is only $10.86 after my coupon, instead of $17.32. I mean I know I'm supposed to tip on the original amount and not the coupon amount, I ain't dumb.

The thing that I don't get is that they always ask you to present the coupon when ordering rather than when the bill comes in. Wouldn't you want the person to see the old amount first so they know how much they saved and how much to tip on? If someone presents the coupon before service then they are reduced to guessing how much to tip based on an amount that doesn't accurately reflect the value of their meal. Doesn't that just make the experience worse? If the servers knows you are going to be the cheap ass with the coupon, wouldn't the service presumably get worse, forcing you to leave a shitty tip because the service was bad and not because you are cheap? Won't this create and endless cycle of shitty service to people that present their coupons before ordering, causing them to tip according to said shitty service forcing the company to stop putting out coupons for their restaurants since no one will want to work for an establishment that caters to a bunch of cheap ass patrons that don't tip well? What in the name's of frugal consumers is one to do? Swallow your pride and tip 20% no matter how bad the service if you are using a coupon or stop clipping altogether and hope for great service with a less enjoyable meal since you know you COULD HAVE been saving $5-8 on that meal?
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