Thursday, August 25, 2005

Worst Jobs

Homer and I were talking one day a while back about what some of the worst jobs are out there. We actually couldn't think of very many but I think this is the current list I have in mind for some of the worst jobs in this world. Feel free to contribute to this list if you can think of others.

1. Omarosa's PR person and husband - you know being that lady's husband is a job 24/7/365 and a crappy job at that. Her PR person constantly has to spin the crazy shit this woman says into something that won't damage her "career"

2. The guy that has to clean up those porn booths that you stick quarters in and watch the girls dance through a glass screen - can you imagine a shittier job? I can...(no pun intended)

3. The guy that has to walk behind the elephants or horses in a parade with the big ass shovel and the garbage can - not only do you have to dogde the piss that flows like the Niagara Waterfalls, you have to pick up the watermelon size shit once the animal chooses to relieve itself.

4. Donald Trump's Hair person - if this man is one of the wealthiest people in the country and this is the best that can be done with his lettuce patch you know the hair stylist has a bad job.

5. The guy that has to help sumo wrestlers out of their cloth and then subsequently clean the cloth - this is just a horrible thought, nuff said

6. Porn movie camera man - many would think this would be a great job but to me being at a job where you have to concentrate and hold the camera steady with an undoubtedly bulging erection has got to be one of the most difficult self imposed pain mechanisms I can think of.

7. Any character at an amusement park - I grew up in O-town and had friends who were characters at Disney. I heard how those kids beat up on you and threw shit on you, man there's no way I wouldn't hit back.

8. Telemarketer - I always interrupt them in the middle of their speech and tell them to take me off their list but I know there are much worse people who curse these people out the shitty part about the job? You can't hang up on anyone.

9. Dental Hygenist - you just know some people come into the dentist after eating some nasty ass garlic and onion laden meal at an Italian restaurant just to punish this poor people and you know that mask can't possibly block out all the stankness.

Last but not least...

10. The person who has to clean the bathroom at your local porn shop - you just know that even though there is a sign explicitly stating that no hanky panky is supposed to go down in the bathroom you get some nasty ass people who can't wait to jerk it.

Any other jobs?


Blogger Puerto Rican Angel said...

Being a janitor or nurse at a sperm bank.- You'd be turned off together with all that sausage everywhere,

Being a gynocologist- Not everybody washes their ass!!!

Bomb squad- Your ass can blow up if you cut the wrong wire. Talk about pressure.

the people that clean porta potties- need I say more.

I'll think of a couple more and I'll let you know.

10:03 AM  
Blogger FreakinRican said...

Wow look how popular I am with the spammers!

10:54 AM  
Blogger chardrian said...

The guys who have to clean out septic tanks.

Professional Russian Roulette players.

1:14 PM  
Blogger Gold Nugget said...

you kind of touched on this, maybe it's the same guy, maybe not, but the guys who have to whipe summo wrestlers; asses when they're done taking a shit. That my friend is bad - think of Fat Bastard and the scene where they look for the beacon and find it in the toilet.
Need I go on?

2:33 PM  
Blogger Kim Plaintive said...

Another crappy job: the person who has to think of the corny copy for the spam comments. "Hey, cooool blog! Funny and informative! Check out my blog when you get a chance. It's about low interest home loans! Cool!"

As for the Disney animals -- my family went to Disney World when I was a baby and my two older sisters were youngsters. It was a hot summer day and apparently it was a little stuffy inside Goofy's costume. He passed out from heat exhaustion. My sisters started screaming from trauma. "Oh no Goofy's DEAD!"

7:07 PM  
Blogger hanmee said...

along the same lines...portapotty cleaner
(guess all the crap cleaning jobs are up there)

6:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You didn't come back to the party. You're off the blogroll!!!

- Homer

3:07 PM  
Blogger FreakinRican said...

I suck I know. It's a shame that I will never obtain a spot in that special dirty feet blogroll. What will I ever do with myself?

3:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sadly, the site has already been taken.
The party got outs of controls, yo.


The German and the Jew

9:00 AM  

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