Monday, August 08, 2005

21st B-day

My 21st birthday was on a thursday so we gathered a big group of us to go a club in O-town that had a dress code. I kinda like dressing up to go out so I was all about going to this club, where the ladies are hot, the drinks are expensive and the music is off the hook (translation for my white friends that means the music was good). It was 21 and over and a few of my friends were under 21 but we got them in since my boy Woody knew the chick that sells roses in the club and she snuck the underage people through the back door.

We get into the club and head straight for the bar. Going out with my boys, I knew I wouldn't be paying for shit all night, but little did I know that I would be "paying" for shit later. We get a shot of liquid cocaine (easily the nastiest shit I have ever tasted) and start heading to the dance floor. We make a couple of more stops at different bars inside the club for some more liquid cocaine (I had 12 shots of this total) and a beer chaser. Mistake #1 the start of my mixing liquor and beer.

After a few songs of bumping and grinding and everybody realizing that it was my birthday, I get a few more drinks. One of my boys had his friend in town who was an uber dance. Homeboy did some work on some music videos back in the day and was representing dancing on a speaker. He saw me dancing near by and was like "Rican switch spots with me nigga, it's your birthday you gotta dance up here." Mistake #2 thinking that I could balance myself on a speaker while dancing and drinking a beer. I started dancing and busting a move (while trying not to bust my pants or my ass) and I felt my beer fall out of my hands and break on the dance floor near some girl's feet. She was drunk as fuck so she just laughed it off. I realized that I wasn't about to fall off this thing so I jumped down and snuck by the beer tub and grabbed a beer while the chick wasn't looking. I have no idea what possessed me to do this but I just figured it's my birthday I can just take shit. Luckily no one saw me and I didn't get booted out of the club.

I kept drinking beer and taking shots. I went upstairs to a different part of the club to check out the ladies. I was so drunk that I thought my "pretend to bump into girls and get them to talk to me" move was incognito. Only later did I find out that it was so obvious my boys were taking bets as to when I was going to do it next. I finally found a chick that the move worked on and we started kicking it. We talked for a minute and I told her it was my birthday. I was like you gotta give me a birthday kiss. She was like sweet and we started making out in the middle of the club. After going at it for a few minutes, I realized I was so drunk I couldn't even tell if this chick was cute (to this day I still don't know but I remember her name was Carmen since that was the name of my first you know!). Mistake #3 - pulling away from her in mid kiss and telling her that I needed to find my friends since they were my ride while thinking in my head, I gotta find my friends so they can tell me whether this chick was cute or not. I just left her there and went to find my boys but never went back to Carmen.

Toward the end of the night, I was so drunk that I couldn't find the bathroom. I recruited my roommate to show me the way and made him promise to stick around since at this point I was completely inebriated. He led the way and I stood in line. I started bitching because there is never a line to the guy's bathroom and the dude in front of me was like no shit man this sucks. At this point I hear the DJ say something like "hey everyone, it's Rican's 21st birthday so if you find him buy him a shot." I raised my hands like I had just won the lottery and started screaming like a little kid running from Neverland. The dude in front of me was like "well hey man it's your birthday you can go in front of me." I told him thanks and went to pass him and tripped on God knows what and I landed straight on my knees. Not my face, chest but my damn knees. I was like fuck (it hurt like a bitch) so he and my roommate helped me up. Mistake #4 thinking I was sober enough to dance, scream and pass some dude in the bathroom line while drunk. This was the last thing I remembered from the club.

Later I found out in pictures, that I was skipping out of the club to the car. I was so sick on the way home that a 15 minute car ride from the club to my place took us 45 mins since I was throwing up all over the place and in the rose seller's car. I was dropped on my street by my boys just cracking up when they were trying to hold me by just my belt (apparently I looked up and told them to just let me go). I woke up in the bathroom on my side with my laundry basket pressed against me (I thought this was a dream until I saw the pictures since I remembered this part). And I found my friends all passed out on the floor, in doorways and outside in the lawn. Man I miss those days...;-)


Blogger Danielle said...

I thought that just said you were 21 on this past Friday. I almost died, but then again, it wouldn't be a real big surprise.

2:18 PM  
Blogger Cherry said...

That is too funny. I can totally picture some wasted dude dancing on speakers, hittin on chicks and biffin it in the bathroom. :)

I miss those days too, but I don't miss the puking and the hangovers. :(

3:14 PM  
Blogger Spexial said...


3:38 PM  
Blogger MsPerdie said...

WOW!!! Luckily I've never had a "drunken" moment when I didn't remeber everything, but I have had some "puking" moments... that I don't miss... I HATE throwing up.. LOL

4:38 PM  
Blogger Kim Plaintive said...

You realize that fool in line at the bathroom tripped you up on purpose... Just to laugh at you because you were tore up and screaming like a girl.

7:30 PM  
Blogger Puerto Rican Angel said...

LMAO!!! I would've paid good money to see you jumping around screaming like a girl!!! What an ass!! LOL

8:07 PM  
Blogger Cherry said...

BTW - I want to hear the hellicopter story already!!

1:10 PM  
Blogger hanmee said...

I've never been drunk (a little buzzed at most), but man! I can't imagine being that drunk and yet still being able to dance, or "dance", as the case may be, by that point. That's funny/scary(?) that you couldn't tell for sure whether the girl was cute. Try to tell yourself that she must have been. Just tell yourself she was...

3:00 PM  

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