Thursday, March 31, 2005

Wireless Internet in Law School Re-visited

Generally I don't like to write about topics I have already written about but this topic just won't go away. I wrote a post about my thoughts about how teachers are making way too big of a deal about the "problem" of having wireless internet in the classrooms here. Now after this past week I think the issue has gotten even worse if you can believe that.

I will preface this by saying that I was only party to one of these events and not the other so my information comes second hand but I'm sure it's true since I've heard it from a lot of different people who were there. Again it seems like this is an us against them topic about whether using the internet is distracting in class (teacher's main argument) or whether the teachers should make the class more interesting (my argument). Here are two events that I personally think are very distracting about this insane debate about a dumb topic.

Yesterday in one of my classes a teacher came in and talked about the things we would be doing in class on Friday. He mentioned something about speaking and then went out of his way to say something along the lines of "now I've noticed all the laptops in our class and all the internet that gets used so I figured we would put it to good use and have you 'google' some topics to answer questions on a worksheet." Now this is strictly busy work. I did not come to law school to learn how to google, I already know how to do that as evidenced by this video. I think that by bringing this topic up again and again (by the way this was the same teacher that tried to "catch" us in the act by coming to the back of the classroom that inspired my first post) it causes more distraction than anything I can pull up on my computer while surfing the internet. Like I said before, I think law students are old and mature enough to ignore what ESPN article I'm reading or what I'm posting about. However, as a teacher the focus is on you (since you are the teacher)and when you do stupid shit like coming to the back of the classroom you are bound to distract everyone in the classroom no matter how mature the student.

The other event happened on Tuesday in one of my friend's classes. Apparently a student was smiling or chuckling at something that was typed by another student's laptop in the back of the room and the teacher just lost and asked things like "Is something funny? Is there something on that laptop that is funny? You know this is a big topic right now in the law school and they might take away the internet because of instances like these." ARE YOU SERIOUS?

You are going to stop midway through a class to call out a student who laughed at something typed in a word document so it wasn't even a wireless internet "distraction". From what I heard the teacher was uber pissed and kinda chewed the student out for a while, went to the board to go back to teach and then turned back around and went after the same student again. Now, I understand, somewhat, the frustration of some teachers who work hard to prepare for class and then find out that someone isn't completely engaged in the topic of discussion, but to sit there in the middle of class and fly off the handle for a good 5-10 minutes in the middle of class is unprofessional and just dumb. Swallow your damn ego and understand that some of the shit that you might think is God's gift to law might not interest someone else. I personally enjoy tax law but I'm not dumb enough to pretend everyone else will have the same infatuation with the IRC that I have. You made the argument about laptops and wireless internet being distracting in class, well what do you think your actions did to your class and credibility? Do you think the students in class went home that afternoon after class and thought about the particular case you were talking about in class or do you think they were talking about their psycho teacher that flipped out at a student for some dumb reason? What do you think the students in your class are going to be thinking about next time they walk into your class? I can promise you it won't be about last night's reading, I'm sure they'll be thinking about "I wonder if she's going to freak out again today." If it bothered you that much, you should have caught the student after class and spoken to him in private.

Why do teachers have the need to tell us that they know that we surf the internet during class and why do they have this vendetta to come and "catch" us in the act? Do you not think this is more distracting than me checking out my fantasy league team? Get over this damn topic because the more you teachers make this out to be a big deal, the more distracting it will be.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Are Most Women Haters???

Now I don't normally like to generalize or stereotype a group of people in a broad category but it seems lately I've noticed something about the women I'm around or I see. I will preface this by saying that the women I'm around consist of work, law school, old friends and reality tv so I know that this is not necessarily true about all women.

First, (and I can't believe I'm admitting this again) while watching the Bachelor on Monday night, I saw a bunch of desparate women who couldn't say a nice thing about another woman on the show if their life depended on it. Granted I understand that is a "fake situation" and competition but still. Can't you just say one damn thing about someone else that doesn't include the word bitch or slut or ho?

Then while at work the other day we got a new temp for a few weeks. She's younger (meaning about my age cause everyone else is older or middle aged) and relatively pretty. Right off the bat the women in the office start talking shit about how she's probably dumb and lazy (which is utterly wrong on both counts since I had to work with her twice this week and she's a good hard worker).

Then of course you talk to your friends from high school (last week) and they start telling me about this person and this person who is married or who is having their next child but instead of just stating that they always include some editorial comment like can you believe she found someone to put up with her, or man that's her 3 kid already and we've only been out of high school for 5 years. Or you talk to some people around and they just always talk shit about other women (unless it's their friends), or they are afraid to admit another woman is pretty. That's one I just don't get. I'm lucky enough that wifey has no problem looking at an attractive woman and saying to me wow she's really pretty, but I've noticed she is the distinct minority. Why is this? Why do some women feel like they have to put down others or can't say anything nice about other women unless they are friends?

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Another Reality TV post (Man I'm a dork)

Alright as I'm sure you guys already know, wifey and I are reality TV junkies. I truly think that our week is mapped out by the powers that be (mainly reality TV producers). I gauge what day of the week it is by what TV show is on that night. Monday night, (and I can't believe I'm admitting this, shoot me now) the Bachelor and the Inferno II. Tuesday night, the Amazing Race and American Idol. Wednesday Idol results and Newlyweds (another one I can't believe I'm admitting). And last but not least my fave night, Thurs with Survivor and the Apprentice. It's a damn good thing the gym we go to has TV's everywhere otherwise we would be screwed.

Last night was the first night of a new season of the Bachelor. Now this is probably one of my least favorites reality TV shows but I watch it since wifey likes it. Actually when she asked me which show I would like to go on I said the Amazing Race, Survivor or the Apprentice, when I asked her the same question she said the Bachelor, what the hell is that about?!?!? (she told me only because of the cool locations of the show but we'll see about that, I'm doing my best to ask her once a week if she'll accept a rose from me).

The thing I don't really like about this show is how people actually pretend that they are coming on here with the intention of getting married. I mean if you look at the show's track record, it's 2-12. Last night's episode was especially troubling for me. There is of course your obligatory cat fights between the women (which I actually enjoy) but what stuck out for me was one of the girls that was just a PSYCHO! I mean the first round she takes off her dress and tells the guy she's a swimsuit model and shows him her moneymaker. I guess she was ok but that right there would turn me off (they only had 2 mins to get to know the guy). But to top it all off the chick pulls out a poem out of her right breast swimsuit piece and reads it to him (I tried as hard as I could not to pee in my pants right then and there when she said I'm not only a model but I'm a poet too). Later on in the show this same girl tells the guy that she models at night and is a private investigator for the government during the day, to which the guy had a classic line, a playboy model and an FBI agent!

At that point I realized the chick was weird but of course she saved the best for last. At the rose ceremony, for some reason the guy didn't give her a rose so she starts crying (which is another reason I don't like this show, why cry over a dude you've known for a week). She then tells the camera that she will always think about him and that she just wanted to tell him that she loved him and that she wanted to hear it back. Are you fucking kidding me? You love him after a week? This should be an interesting season. Oh girls just a word of advice, if you want to keep a guy around, don't tell him after the first week that you love him, that you are ready for marriage, that you want kids, or anything remotely like that. News flash TOTAL TURN OFF!

Monday, March 28, 2005

Spring Break Thoughts

Now that I've given you the recap of the interview from hell and the rest of my spring break (see below), here are some thoughts I have in general about spring break.

First, I'm very depressed right now. Not because I'm back in cold weather (although if you ask the people up here I'm sure 50's isn't cold to them), but rather because when I stepped off the plane in Madison, I realized that this was my last spring break of my life (at least for a long while since wifey informed me I was done going to school for a while). As I stated before my buddies and I went out all week last week but it was going out at home, it wasn't going to some club at some spot we had never been before though and probably would only return in our memories.

Gone are the days where my name isn't Gerry but something like Trace, or Luther or some other crazy names. Gone are also the days where we were "UCF Football Players" (after this 0-11 season they just put up I'm sure we would make up another school). Lastly, gone are the days where we would get up early and trade tickets with the other 10 people in the room to go down and get our continental breakfast, go to Walmart after that, spend $100/day on cases on beer, $2 on a loaf of bread, some peanut butter and jelly.

Now spring breaks consist of job interviews, going out in our hometown and playing golf. Which isn't too bad, but taking everything into account and realizing that this is the end of the road, just makes me feel old. At least I won't turn 30 for another 4 years!

Spring Break Recap

I apologize to my 3 readers about the long layoff between posts but as I'm sure you 3 already knew I was in Florida for my spring break. Here is a basic recap.

I got down to Florida, turned my phone on and had a message waiting for me from a Tallahassee employer wondering if I could interview with them. So right off the bat I'm happy yet disappointed because one day of my short vacation is shot right off the bat. To make matters worse, I didn't bring a suit down with me so I had to borrow my father in law's shirt, jacket, my mom's friend's pants and shoes and someone else's tie (neither of which match so I'm sure I made a great impression).

I get to the place after the 4 hour drive from O-town and right off the bat the lady hands me a file about an inch thick and tells me the first part of my interview consists reading this file and writing a memo on it outlining the issue, the applicable law and my recommendation for a course of action. Now normally this wouldn't be a big deal but I really wasn't prepared for this. I was prepared to lie about why I love the city of Tallahassee, that it's been my dream to move there ever since I turned down FSU to go to UCF, and how this is the perfect job for me.

After taking the first 45 mins to read the file I knew I was screwed with the memo part since I only had 15 mins to write, and nowhere in the file was the applicable law so I had to make up shit. To make matters worse the office was about 87 degrees inside so not only am I uncomfortable because I'm wearing other people's clothes, I'm sweating my ass off and stressing out. Finally the process was over and we went through the traditional interview Q & A session with a wrinkle. Her last question to me was, "Who is your favorite musical artist?" Before I could even stop my mouth from opening I had listed all the members of 2-live Crew (j/k) but my answer was probably just as bad. I said Tupac and proceeded to stick my foot further in my mouth by trying to explain to this older woman why Tupac is a good choice and that even though he cursed in his music, it can still be inspirational.

The last couple of days of spring break consisted of some hard core slacking off. My days generally went like this, I got up at around 10 am, went and laid by my mom's pool for a couple of hours, play a round of golf in the afternoon, go to a decent place for dinner since my parents were paying and then getting trashed at night with my friends pretending we were back in our "traditional" spring break locations. Needless to say it's not fun being back.

Friday, March 18, 2005

Gotta Love March Sports News

I'm pumped about the tournament. I only lost one pick from yesterday's pool (damn you Iowa, I thought you had more in you after playing Illinois tough and almost beating the Badgers in the tournament). So far I'm ahead in the pool that I'm running, which undoubtedly will raise some eyebrows with my fellow players but oh well. I must say though after looking at my picks for today's games, I'm not quite as confident. I think I picked too many upsets.

Staying with sports but in a different sense, the Congress subpoenaed (spelling) some prominent former and current Major League Baseball Players yesterday along with some high ranking officials (Commissioner Bud Selig and MLBPA head Donald Fehr). I tried to listen to most of it on the radio and read transcripts of the parts that I didn't hear but damn 11 hours of shit to try to read is a lot so I skimmed. I'm convinced that Congress called this session to grandstand more than anything else. The Congress men and women were up there hammering baseball about what it should have done in the past and about the current policy that baseball misled people to believe would give a first time offender an automatic 10 day suspension (there is a provision that says OR up to $10,000 fine, any fine lawyer can tell you the word OR is one of the strongest words in a legal sense because it can provide an out for a lot of penalties).

I played baseball a lot of years. I was lucky to play all the way into college and can honestly say I've never seen steroids in any locker room I've ever been in. Now I'm not naive enough to think it doesn't go on, I'm just saying I never saw it. That being said, I don't think it's Congress' job to police baseball. I think baseball has messed up big time with steroids but I think it's up to them to decide if how they want to run their business. If they want to promote steroids so be it, let the fans decide whether or not to support a bunch of cheaters. Oh well who knows what happens from here on out, what I do know is that Mark McGwire sure as hell looked guilty to me and that Sammy Sosa probably was lying when he said he's never done steroids.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Women in Law School?

My boy Homer told me the other day that he heard a funny quote about the women in law school. He said someone mentioned to him that being the prettiest girl in law school is like being the valedictorian at summer school. This was just a classic so I tried to think of a few others analogies that can compare and here's what I came up with.

Being the prettiest girl in law school is like being the tallest member of a midget family.

Being the prettiest girl in law school is like having the best apartment in a project building.

Being the prettiest girl in law school is like having the newest trailer at the trailer park.

Anyone else got any ideas? PS: this can be interchangeable between guys and girls.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Laptops in law school and wireless internet

Here at UW Law School a topic that has been "hot button" lately is the increased use of laptops in classrooms and the use of wireless internet on those laptops. Some of the links that I have on the right have commented on it including Conglomerate. Apparently some people think that laptops should be banned or if not banned perhaps turning off the internet in the classroom because it can be distracting.

Here's my reaction to that. F*ck off! I mean why do you care so much about this topic? It's not an epidemic or that big of a problem. If some people are playing online during class make your class more interesting instead of boring us to death with some insignificant detail of a case we will never see again. If the professors really want to due away with the problem, then ensure that the class is engaged in your conversation.

As far as the internet being distracting to the students around the rebel law student looking at his fantasy baseball team or her latest shoe purchase to that I say that's a lame excuse. We aren't in kindergarten. When you enter into law school you are usually at least 22-23 years old. By that point you are old enough to pay attention and ignore distractions if you so choose. You got through 13 years of preliminary education and 4 years of college somehow right? Give these students some freaking credit. You can't bullshit your way into law school (although I'm sure I snuck in somehow). If a student isn't mature enough to ignore computers in classroom by the time he/she is in law school then your Admissions Committee did a shitty job of selecting applicants that are qualified for a legal education.

I am one of those students who enjoys surfing the net during class. Sometimes I just don't care about the latest case in constitution law or how the UCC applies only to goods not to services. However, I am making the choice to do that. By paying up the ass for my legal education, I should have the right to put the effort in that I feel like putting in as long as I'm not distracting class. Again, the argument that it distracts people in class is weak. These are adults people not children give them some credit please.

Lastly, what inspired this post was that some teacher that seems to be on a mission to stop online using during his class had the gall to come into the class to see what was on our screens. You know what dude if it's that big of deal to you, take a good look because I'm writing about how DISTRACTING you are for coming to the back of the class where teachers don't belong!

Monday, March 14, 2005

Madness Baby!!!!

It's about that time boys and girls. The NCAA Basketball Tournament is here. As I have said before this is probably my favorite time of year. You have spring training baseball where the stadiums are so small you can actually see the players, and of course the NCAA Tournament gets started.

This is the first year I'm going to fill out a "bracket" and find out exactly how much sports knowledge I possess. I'm also uber excited because both of my schools are in the tournament. UCF is a 15 seed (kinda low, I thought 14 but oh well) playing against defending national champion UConn. This is a total David vs. Goliath match but you never know. UCF is a good team and believe it or not has the most wins out of any of the schools in the state of Florida over the last 4 year period.

Wisconsin is a 6 seed (which is higher than I thought they would be) looking at a first round match up against Northern Iowa. I must admit I don't know a lot about Northern Iowa but I've seen a few "experts" pick the upset against Wisconsin so this doesn't look like an easy game. However, I think Wisconsin will advance to play Kansas in the next round and potentially beat them to reach the Sweet 16 because Kansas has been up and down all year.

Finally, my Final Four looks like this, North Carolina, Illinois (man it hurts to pick them), Gonzaga, and Kentucky. The National Championship game I have Illinois vs. North Carolina with the Tar Heels cutting down the nets in St. Louis.

Friday, March 11, 2005

Survivor Recap

By far the best reality tv show on tv. Last night's show was pretty funny. I first found out (since I didn't watch last week) that one of my team members had basically voted himself out because he sprained his ankle. What a puss I mean he could have cost me the lead (however he didn't) but I digress.

The Reward Challenge consisted of the teams picking a leader and having him/her choose 6 tools to build an outhouse and a shower. The Host, Jeff, stated that he would bring back the set designer of Survivor to judge the competition. The winner would have the set designer people come build them a shelter (the best reward I've seen yet). The winner will know they won because the builders will be back later that day.

The older team picked Ian (who is now on my team) and got to work immediately on the outhouse and shower. Considering they didn't have any "construction workers" on their team they built a high quality outhouse and shower (we found out later that Ian's dad owns a construction company so he has some experience). This team ended up winning because of their aesthetically pleasing and sturdy design.

The hottie team (which is losing hotties by the minute), couldn't even pick a leader until Jeff forced them to pick one. They ended up picking the redneck James. This turned out to be good because he's actually a construction worker so he promptly stated that they would win this competition. They got to work and worked up to the minute that Jeff and the architech came by. Their design was also high quality but less sturdy than the older team so another competition was lost.

The Immunity Challenge posed the teams against each other in a sumo style fight. They had to fight with a padded pillow with handles. They could only use the pillow to fight and had to push the other person in the water to score. The first team to 6 wins. The older group should have a distinct disadvantage since the hotties that are left (with the exception of the hill billy) are strong and young. However, the men for the younger tribe came up weak. They lost 5 out of a possible 6 fights. The older team built up a big lead (5-2) but the hotties came back behind a strong performance from the ladies. It was tied at 5-5 and the last fight was between the hill billy (skinny tall dude from the hottie team) and a gay hair dresser from the older team. Naturally the gay hair dresser came out and beat the hill billy once again to which the redneck say (I never thought I'd lose to a homosexual but that boy has some ass on him).

At tribal Jeff yelled at the team to perform better because they are getting their asses beat and have only won 2 out of a possible 7 matches. They voted out Kim (lazy but hot blonde) leaving them with 3 guys and 2 girls meaning the girls could be a target now.

Apprentice Recap

Alright folks, I slacked off last week on my reality recap but I had a good excuse (I was getting drunk with some fellow latinos). Here is this week's recap.

The Donald decided to split the teams up (corporate reorganization) and had the two project managers select the people they "don't want on your team." Predictably the two PMs booted the people who "create drama." Their task was to meet with 5 musicians each and auction off something (time with the artist, vacation with artist, spot in a music video, etc). The team that was formerly just the high schoolers had the following artists: Simple Plan (kinda cool), New Found Glory (also kind of cool but similar music), Gene Simmons (who was totally lame), Bare Naked Ladies (which would have been cool like 5 years ago) and Fat Joe (the line of the night regarding him was when Trump asked George if he knew who Fat Joe was and George replied if it isn't Simon and Garfunkel I don't listen to it). The other team had the hip hop crew of Lil Jon, Lil Kim, Moby, Eve, and Jadakiss.

The auction for the former college kids was just funny. Considering the auction was for AIDS research I thought it was classic that one of the team members that went live on the air consented to being called a MILF live. Then she's like "it means a mom I'd like to fool around with." Uh lady, it's not MILFAW it's MILF. It's mom I'd like to Fuck. Anyways to make a long boring post shorter, that team won by raising $19K mostly for one week getaways with Moby (which to me sounds lame) and with lil Kim (which I think would be cool).

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Not as good as I thought

It's a little disheartening to know that the only pitcher to strike me out my entire senior year in high school is giving up pitching because he can't find the strike zone. ESPN has a story here about Rick Ankiel switching from pitching to tryout for an outfield position. Now I don't consider myself to be God's gift to baseball, but I do think that I was pretty good so this is definitely a blow to the ego.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Time for more tests

I don't know where the hell I find these things but I think they are mad cool so I hope the 4 readers that I'm up to don't mind and actually take these tests.

I'm pumped about my karma!




You Have Fantastic Karma







You are a kind, sensitive, and giving person.

And all your good deeds will pay off - if they haven't already.

But you're not so concerned with what you get in return anyway.

You have an innate caring nature - and nothing can change that!




I'm not sure what to think about my crayon color (it kinda sucks actually)




You are








I was totally surprised to learn I'm exactly 50-50 left/right brained.




You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained



The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning.

Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others.

If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic.

Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.



The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility.

Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way.

If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art.

Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.





For those of you who know me well know this is a complete shock. I'm 100% Extrovert




You Are 100% Extrovert, 0% Introvert



You are as outgoing as they come

The life of the party, you're friends with everyone

You're a people person, and you are quite the entertainer

You love being around a crowd and acting spontaneously




Last but not least for my Florida connection here is an interesting finding, they are all true except I only know of someone who's been struck by lightning, I didn't know them personally.




You Know You're From Florida When...


You own at least five pairs of flip flops

You know someone who's been struck by lightning

You're more scared of the freaks who live down the street than gators

Your backyard is sometimes a swamp

You're officially sick of Disney

You shrug off hurricane warnings

You've been permanently blinded by fat men in speedos

There are only two seasons - hot and hotter

You've drank a flaming alligator.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Florida.




Monday, March 07, 2005

Bloggers unite!!!

Here is an interesting article about bloggers that were fired as a result of the information they put on their sites regarding their employers. One lady got fired for putting "racy" pictures of herself in her uniform on her blog and the other guy got the boot for questioning his employer's finances.

I don't know about you but I think that's just bullshit. I can't believe that a company can fire you for something that you do on your own time. Granted I can understand the firing for wearing the uniform on a site but think of the promotional possibilities ("Girls of the airlines gone wild"), but firing a guy because he questions his employers finances are you kidding me? I have yet to meet anyone that hasn't complained about work at one time or another to their friends, spouse, bum on the street, etc. How is blogging about it any different? Because there is more of an opportunity for people to hear it?

I don't pretend to be a 1st Amendment expert, but this has to border on a violation of a person's right to free speech. It's not combative, you aren't provoking anyone to act irrationally or can put people in danger (like screaming fire in a crowded movie theatre) so what's the deal? I think after I get my license in June this is going to be my first fight in the American Legal System to protect my right and the rights of all the other nerds...uh I mean bloggers so write about anything they damn well please. Even if it means I have to pose for pictures and put them on my blog of the scales of justice strategically placed to show that I'm a lawyer!

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Un-PC Humor

At the suggestion of my boy Homer, I rented Harold and Kumar go to White Castle yesterday. He told me it was hilarious while another friend told me it sucked so I was conflicted. After watching it, I have to say it was one of the funnier movies I've seen this year. The humor is totally along my way of thinking. The jokes are geared toward race and toilet humor. Which got me thinking why aren't there more race humor movies out there? I personally know that there are lots of people who find that stuff funny. For example here's something that I've observed in my time here in Madison and back in Orlando (which I'm sure will piss people off but oh well deal with it).

Why is it that black people work at Taco Bell and hispanic people work at KFC (for those of you that don't know one of the racial humor stereotypes is that black people like fried chicken, cornbread and kool-aid). Do they think that if Taco Bell hires a brown person that their inventory is all of a sudden going to get low? "Excuse me sir can I get a burrito Bel Grande please? Nah man (insert licking fingers noise here) I just ate the last one." And vice versa for black people and KFC. "Ah yes sir I'd like a bucket of the colonel's finest please (in the most white voice you can think of). Sorry bro, Jerome just came back from his lunch break and cleaned us out." Has anyone else noticed this? Or am I alone?

Friday, March 04, 2005

Kids today

When all the stories lately started coming out about kids having sex with their teachers the first thing that came to my mind was "where the hell were these teachers when I was in school"? It seemed like all these teachers were totally hot and relatively young (although not as young as their "prey").

Now comes an article about another teacher having sex with students but this is probably more realistic. Here is the article and accompanying picture. This is what a lot of my teachers looked like and I can understand why this person would need to prey on students. However thinking back to my raging hormones when I was 15, there is still NO WAY IN HELL I would ever get down with this lady. I mean come on, she looks like a garbage pail kid. Oh well, I'm sure next week we'll get another story about a hot teacher banging some 15 year old kid.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Lunch with a Pre-1L

I'm going to lunch with a prospective law student today and quite frankly I'm at a lost as to what to talk to her about (however if she's cute I'm sure I can think of something to say along the lines of "where are you from? Prettyville?"). I was thinking about talking to her about the stresses of law school and how hard the teachers make you work but frankly, considering I spend all of class online or trying to figure out why my wireless internet isn't working, that might not be the route to take.

Then I started thinking about telling her about how serious our faculty is about our getting an education and cares about our learning but then if that's true why do they welcome you with open arms and beer tap in hand? If they cared about your education they would give you a book not a beer (I'm by no means complaining I'm just saying). So as you can see I'm kind of at a loss as to what to talk about considering my law school experience has been pretty much booze, learn a little and fuck around a lot.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

What's on Tap?

It has recently come to my attention from wifey (which is a surprise since she doesn't drink much) that there is a beer in North Wisconsin that is called Greasy Dick. This is quite disturbing considering I also noticed that at the Nitty Gritty in Middleton there was a beer on tap called something Butt. Can you imagine going up to the bar and ordering one of each? "Hi I'd like a tall glass of Greasy Dick and a glass of Butt." What the hell would you think as a bartender? Or if it's like some of the bars here in town where you have to scream your order because everyone talks so damn loud and you scream I'd like some Greasy Dick just as the bar gets quiet. How does one recover from that embarrassment?

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Memories

ESPN has a great article on good spring training battles from yesteryear here. I especially found the race between the two old owners and the eye black on the Kirk Gibson's hat especially funny. It reminded me of some of the stunts we used to play on each other and other teams back in the day.

For example, my senior year of high school our baseball team put sugar all over the field of our rival high school and the next day that school couldn't figure out why ants had torn up their entire field so they had to play the entire season as away games since they couldn't play on their field. There is always the classic bubble on your teammates caps while they aren't looking. But my fave was when we put the eye black all over one of my teammates glove (black of course) because we knew he liked to put his glove over his mouth when he talked to the pitcher (which is pretty common so the other team can't read your lips). He had a ring around his mouth like a drawn on goatee for the entire game and didn't realize it until after the game when we went to the locker room.

College Sports and new academic standards?

The NCAA (National Collegiate Athletic Association for those of you who don't know) has issued new guidelines for schools to follow tying scholarships offered to athletes and graduation rates. Now at first glance this sounds like a noble effort at an important topic. After all only about 1% of all college athletes are going to play professional sports so what is the other 99% to do besides get an education right?

The problem is my cynical side is saying that this is just a cover up to make themselves look good. The academic guidelines for college athletes are a joke as it is anyway. I believe all you have to have to continue playing is something like a 1.75 GPA, that's like a C minus. That's can't be all that hard to get right? Well let me give you a little insight of how it was at my esteemed undergraduate institution.

I chose a major that was obviously going to get me far in the real world, Organizational Communications. Can anyone tell me what the hell that means cause I sure can't (which makes for an interesting answer out of my mouth when interviewers ask me what it means). It was the major selected by the majority of athletes and cheerleaders. Now I'm not trying to suggest that those people aren't smart but hear me out. I had classes with one of our "premier" football players (who is black) and come test time a mysterious white guy with the same name always seemed to sit in his seat and take his tests...hmm interesting. Point number two, my boy J-dub had a class with a player on our basketball team (that was shitty back in the day) and he gave him the scantron already filled out before the test was even handed out...hmm how does he know the answers already?

Like I said, I applaud the NCAA for the effort but give me a f--cking break if I have a little bit of a cynical view on this.
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